


Keep Calm and Reach for Your Phaser Slowly

by orphan_account



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Humor, Linear Timeline What Linear Timeline, Lots of Phasers, M/M, Multiple Pairings, Oh God This Ship Is Run By Six Year Olds, Other, Space Frolicking, Violence, Why Do People Allow Me to Write, lots of bickering, oneshots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-30
Updated: 2013-11-30
Packaged: 2018-01-03 01:43:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1064203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Or, you know that thing?  That thing that happened in the movies, but didn't quite make it to the screen, but still totally happened.  Yeah.  THAT thing.  You know the one.<br/>Alternately titled: "Crew Bonding Exercises for the Socially Challenged."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Keep Calm and Reach for Your Phaser Slowly

**Author's Note:**

> So, with the understanding that I pretty much write well only when I currently am working on my writing practice thingies of doom (and then the skills immediately and summarily vanish, thank you shitty karma beasts), I have decided to bite the bullet and post the short prompts I've done. Am doing. Whatever.
> 
> These are actually good. For perspective, these were written the same way A Cross-Species Guide was written. The Guide was written for one of these prompts, just expanded a lot.
> 
> Anyway, this one is about Spock Prime and Jim and snowbeasts, when they first meet. Have fun~

They can’t exactly head straight to the lithium-cracking station right now. The wind is howling outside. Almost as soon as Kirk ran into Old Man Spock, a blizzard of epic proportions began and now they’re both huddled around a campfire. Kirk feels kind of cold anyway, and useless. Vulcan just imploded. He can’t do jack but warm his fingers and think about all the stuff Old Man Spock had in his head.  
  
Yeah, and wonder if he’s supposed to know about any of this stuff. He kind of MASSIVELY DOUBTS IT.  
  
“You are… quiet,” Old Man Spock observes, pausing for just long enough that Jim thinks he was going to say something else. Maybe he was going to crack some kind of Old Man Kirk inside joke. Jim is pretty certain they have those.  
  
Still have those. Whatever. Old Man Kirk is already dead where Old Man Spock is from. Kirk is trying to feel less nauseous about that.  
  
His discomfort must show like a motherfucker, because the next thing Old Man Spock says is, “Are you discomfited by what you have seen?”  
  
He places enough emphasis on ‘seen’ for Kirk to know what he really means.  
  
Kirk shrugs and surprises himself when he says, “Honestly? Yeah. I think I’m messing up your future big time.”  
  
He’s cold, sitting on his ass after he let an entire world get destroyed, and he’s here with Spock (granted, a vastly less abrasive, more interesting version of Spock. Kirk cannot picture Younger Spock facing down a snowbeast with a torch). He’s allowed to sulk.  
  
Old Man Spock reflects. “Jim, are you familiar with the occasion of our first meeting?”  
  
No, Jim did not see that part in the old Vulcan’s melon. He looks up.  
  
Old Man Spock says gravely, “We were at a tournament. I challenged you to a match. Within the hour, you had thrown several objects at my head and I had been driven to petty insults. We were escorted off the premises by security. I believe you later tried to orchestrate our mutual defenestration, but you knocked yourself unconscious on the wall instead.”  
  
Kirk’s eyes are huge. Wow. He must have been _so_ drunk back then. Cause Old Man Spock is totally less of a d—  
  
“I then tried to have you expelled from the academy,” Old Man Spock muses thoughtfully. “I was unaware that you were a professor, not a student.” At Kirk’s gaping, he adds—and this time Kirk catches the wicked gleam in his eye—“It was, furthermore, a chess tournament.”  
  
Kirk does not have the words for this. Old Man Spock pats him on the arm.  
  
“I do not think you can ruin our future,” he says warmly.


End file.
